I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
Its only once in a life time you get to pick your vcard swiper up from jail
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
Randomize
