I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
The strip club incident sums up our friendship pretty well
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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