My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
I'm really sorry I called you a "smug, arrogant, boyfriend-fucking piece of defecation". I was super drunk.
I was going to be mad, but then I remembered you don't use autocorrect and spelled everything correctly and I was kinda impressed.
Randomize
