your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
Can you put "designated driver" on a resume?
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
We have started to decorate penises.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.