thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
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