i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
hi, I love you... and I'm sorry your floor is covered in popcorn, your cabinet is broken, all your alcohol is gone, you're 80 dollars poorer, everything in your bedside table is soaked in beer, austin slept in your bed in those disgusting underwear, I made out with your toilet seat, and for talking to your mom with a four loko in my hand
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
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