Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
tonight lets celebrate not being married
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
So I told her I dislocated my shoulder and she said "well okay. I can either be on top or blow you."
Decisions, decisions.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize