all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
I woke up at 4am on the couch with half my clothes on. And by half my clothes I mean my earrings.
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
