The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
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