Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
Randomize
