I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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