whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
she said she didn't want to sleep with me again because I wasnt a generous lover. I ignored her slight moustache, didnt i? i think thats pretty damn generous
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
