if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
I was cleaning out my bag and I found some xanax wrapped in plastic with a note that said "use in case of emergency"
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
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