Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
I need a legitimate reason as to why the microwave door is in the shower
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
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