do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Just realized I probably only have one more wedding where I can say I fucked the bride.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
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