Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
I often worry that if I get famous, people from my past will recognize me and start talking to the media
I am watching Wayne Gretzky and Alexander oveckhin play video games for charity. What is life right now.
Randomize