Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
He wanted me naked, so I got naked. You can't hold that against me.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
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