Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
