Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize
