Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
not ubering you a puppy
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
