god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
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