this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
Randomize