Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
Apparently married women at the office don't like getting congratulated on getting "knocked up"
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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