Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
That girl that gave me a blowjob, I think I fired her last year.
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She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
My night started to turn around the time I started calling her a "raggedy cunt".
Somehow she got that I meant it as a term of endearment.
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Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
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