i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
I found him in the livingroom trying to soak up broken glass with the clock from the kitchen.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
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