I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
Randomize
