u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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