Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Randomize
