You don't have asthma, your pregnant
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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