Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
we have pet lesbian snakes
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
Randomize
