You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
Randomize
