I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
Hippo gnu deer
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
