I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
i'm going as a slutty football player, and all night i'll drunkily whisper "id love to catch your balls." into random strangers ears.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
