I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
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