I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
Everything about him screamed your future.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I got inside last night via doggy door
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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