this beer tastes like vomit already
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
