He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
is this the sara with the beer cane?
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
