I must be too annoying 4 u.
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Vodka?
Forever.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Randomize