I wannas sexs uuuuu
Small penises have feelings too.
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
