We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
reminds me of losing my job
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I woke up with like grass burns all over my body, i'm pretty sure i made out with someone under a bus. . . but i'm not sure
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
A dude just looked at me like my drunk swaying was corrupting his progeny DUDE YOUR KID HAS A MULLET YOU'VE ALREADY RUINED HIM
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.