the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize