I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
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