there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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