I definitely just put my boxers on backwards.
haha now u have to piss out ur bum
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
