i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
Randomize
