love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
So, you didn't have time to come pick me up but you did have time to get plastered and then write "champagne money" on every one of my statuses for the past month?
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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