Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
entire chemistry final was about beer... i actually might miss this place
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
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