You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
I just had a brazillian performed by a hungarian named olga. Im pretty sure she was trying to rip out my soul. You owe me a million orgasms
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
I just had sex on a roof
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
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