so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
They should really pass out barf bags in church
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?