There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
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