Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Oh jesus...leave it to you to hit on not one but two guys who can't fuck you till marriage.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
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