Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
I was giving him a blow job in the kitchen, but it was uncomfortable. so i took the oven mitts and used them as knee pads.
Don't tell me i'm not fucking resourceful.
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
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